Love. A word that many of us use a lot. We love a particular color, type of food, activity, etc. We love other people too – our family, friends, partners… even if we don’t feel comfortable admitting it.
Did you know that humans can actually experience eight different types of love? We can experience them with our romantic partners, friends, family and even complete strangers we meet in the street.
Philia: Affectionate Love
Philia is love with no romantic attraction and happens between friends and family members. It can also be the love between lovers who have been together for a long time and are not so passionate and involved anymore.
This kind of love, also referred to as brotherly love, happens when both people share the same beliefs and respect each other.
Pragma: Enduring Love
Pragma is a special kind of bonded love that evolves over the years. It’s a never-ending love between two people that choose to put equal effort into their romantic relationship. You need commitment, devotion and perseverance to reach such love – you choose, and therefore, stay in love.
Storge: Familiar Love
Storge is a love that happens naturally and can be found in parents and children, as well as best friends. This infinite love is built upon acceptance and strong emotional attachment. It comes effortlessly and without delay in parent and child relationships.
Your memories foster long-lasting bonds with other people. As you generate more memories, the quality of your relationship enhances.
Eros: Romantic Love
Eros is a primal love and a natural instinct for the majority of humans. It’s a passionate love demonstrated through physical affection. These affectionate behaviors include holding hands, hugging, kissing – and much more.
This kind of love is a yearning for another person’s body. The main culprits for this kind of love are hormones that start a fire in your body and have to be satisfied with romantic actions.
Ludus: Playful Love
Ludus is a youthful and flirtatious love usually found in the beginning phase of a relationship. This kind of love consists of trifling, playful motives and giggles between two people.
Even though it is most commonly found in young couples, older couples who seek this kind of love acquire a more pleasing relationship. Our emotions and hormones lead to and allow us to feel giddy, worked up and interested in the other person.
Philautia: Self Love
Philautia is a healthy kind of love where you perceive your self-worth and don’t overlook your personal needs. It begins with acknowledging your accountability for your well-being.
Without self love it can be challenging to experience and demonstrate other types of love since you can’t really offer something you don’t have. Your psyche allows you to reflect upon your basic needs, as well as your physical, emotional and mental well being.
Agape: Selfless Love
Agape is the top level of love to offer. It’s given with no expectations of receiving something in return. Offering this kind of love is a choice to spread love in any circumstances – even when they’re destructive.
Selfless love is not a physical act, but a feeling – yet the acts of self-love can evoke Agape since self-monitoring drives to results. Your soul creates a purpose that is bigger than yourself. It encourages you to pass kindness on to others.
Mania: Obsessive Love
This kind of love is obsessive towards a partner. It usually leads to undesirable jealousy or possessiveness – best described as codependency. Majority of cases of obsessive love can be found in couples with a disproportion of love towards each other.
The disproportion of romantic and playful love is the primary cause of Mania. A person’s survival instinct drives him to desperately need their partner to gain a sense of self-value.
The Dangerous Kind of Love
Obsessive love is the kind of love where intense fixation and compulsive behaviors can cause severe pain and worry and destroy romantic relationships.
But obsessiveness can go even beyond sheer relational sabotage. It can exhibit a very dangerous side to it, known as pathological obsessive love, which is not only damaging, but so extreme and pathological that it causes some of the most awful evil acts done in the name of “love.”
Most obsessive relationships never lead to violence and murderous acts. However, most is not all.
The majority of people who’ve experienced an obsession with a romantic interest understand that this addictive kind of love can lead to inappropriate behavior, but acts of violence or committing murder in the name of “love” is an entirely different matter.
The bond between violence and pathological obsessive love is the most destructive and serious side of love addiction. According to the FBI crime reports, over 10% of murders in the US were committed by the victim’s partner or lover.
This obsessive dangerous kind of love can also be a sign of a serious mental health condition, and if untreated, can devastate friendships and relationships. It could also bring about other severe mental health concerns.
It is possible to address the mental health issues and other causes that can lead to pathological obsessive love with adequate support. Be that as it may, this is only possible if the person experiencing obsessive love finds help and support.